FACING LIFE'S CHALLENGES
❝Setbacks pave the way for comebacks. Obstacles are part of the journey.❞ -unknown
As we hit the trail, I figured I was prepared. Everything I've read about this hike says it's a pretty well-traveled path. I think it's going to be a relatively easy hike. Indeed, it started wide and flat, following a river upstream. So far, it's even easier than I thought. The only problem I have is with these tree roots that I keep tripping over.
Only a few minutes later, I started to step on a tree root only to discover it was a gigantic snake! I would pay anything for the footage of me doing the avoid-the-snake dance!
Later in the hike, we realize the trail is getting intense. There were steep switchbacks and a part that would be more accurately described as "rock-climbing" rather than "a trail."
The summit was beautiful, with breathtaking views. It filled me with awe and gratitude. Suddenly, I was no longer complaining about how difficult the hike was but how worth it I felt it was.
Reflecting back on the hike, a couple of things come to mind. The first is the steep inclines coupled with the heat and humidity. This was a challenge, but this was something that we should have expected. It was a summer day, and we were hiking to the summit of a waterfall. What else would we expect? Additionally, we needed those challenges to make this hike worthwhile. If there were no steep inclines to climb, we would never have made it to the top of the mountain. Those challenges were part of the reward.
The second thing that comes to mind is that we encountered some things that were possible but not anything that felt probable. It's not every day you almost step on a gigantic snake. Most of our hikes don't include a rock climbing section so intense that our dog is afraid to do it. Yet, these challenges presented themselves, and we did what we had to do.
This experience served as a powerful metaphor for life’s challenges. Some obstacles—like the steep climb—are expected and integral to our journey. Others, like the snake, can be setbacks that arise unexpectedly, reminding us of life’s unpredictability.
BAD THINGS HAPPEN - EXPECT THEM
It’s an undeniable truth: bad things happen.
This might seem obvious, yet we often act as though life should unfold seamlessly. When faced with challenges, it’s common to react with frustration and disappointment, as if difficulties were unwelcome intruders in an otherwise perfect plan. We tend to envision a world free from obstacles, leading to a constant state of irritation whenever reality proves otherwise. However, author Sam Harris reminds us that life consists of a continuous stream of challenges, and anticipating them can alleviate much of the frustration when they occur.
Interestingly, a world devoid of challenges would not only be unrealistic but also undesirable. Human beings have a remarkable capacity to get used to their surroundings. If we lived in a state of constant happiness without challenges, what we currently perceive as joy would become our new baseline. We would require even greater doses of happiness to feel fulfilled. Challenges serve to heighten our appreciation for the good times, ensuring we don’t take them for granted.
In fact, struggle seems to be required for us to feel a sense of satisfaction. Think back to your proudest story - the one about solving some difficult challenge and overcoming it. Most people's go-to story has an element of overcoming a difficult set of circumstances - that's not a coincidence.
|
 |
Resilience is the ability to bounce back (or grow) from stress and adversity. The ability to maintain physical, mental, and emotional well-being in the face of setbacks. Learn more about how resilient you are. |
 |
|
RECOGNIZING SETBACKS AND OBSTACLES
Obstacles are those challenges we know will arise. They’re the hurdles we expect to face, akin to navigating an obstacle course. Acknowledging their presence can change how we approach our days. Instead of bracing for disappointment, we can prepare ourselves to navigate these inevitable hurdles with a sense of purpose.
In contrast, setbacks are the unexpected challenges that can catch us off guard. While they are possible, they’re not guaranteed, making their arrival all the more jarring. For instance, encountering heavy traffic on the way to an important meeting is a common setback that can disrupt our plans, whereas knowing there will be some level of traffic is an expected obstacle.
EMBRACE BOTH FOR GROWTH
Navigating life’s journey requires us to embrace both obstacles and setbacks. Each presents an opportunity for growth. By recognizing obstacles as predictable challenges, we can mentally prepare ourselves to face them. Setbacks, though less predictable, can teach us resilience and adaptability.
Consider the perspective that some setbacks, while not guaranteed, are likely enough to warrant our attention. Knowing that some form of setback will occur encourages us to remain adaptable. We might not know the specifics, but the understanding that life will throw challenges our way allows us to shift our mindset.
Once a challenge arises, it becomes a present reality. Complaining about it serves little purpose. Instead, we can reframe the situation as a challenge to overcome, shifting our focus from the problem to the solution.
We don't know which setbacks will happen, but we do know that some setbacks will happen. It's like we can treat the fact that some sort of setbacks will happen as one obstacle. In other words, obstacles are what we know will happen, and we know some setback will happen.
So, the next time you encounter a setback or obstacle, take a deep breath and respond with determination. Embrace the idea that challenges are not roadblocks but stepping stones on your journey. By accepting these challenges with an open mind and a problem-solving attitude, you’ll find greater peace and fulfillment in the process. Life may be unpredictable, but with the right mindset, every challenge can be an opportunity for growth.
You only have one life. Live intentionally.
If you know someone else who would benefit from reading this, please share it with them. Spread the word, if you think there's a word to spread.
To share via text, social media, or email, simply copy and paste the following link:
REFERENCES AND INFLUENCES
Ben-Shahar, Tal: Happier, No Matter What
Biwas-Diener, Robert & Todd Kashdan: The Upside of Your Dark Side
Bloom, Paul: The Sweet Spot
Burkeman, Oliver: The Antidote
Emmons, Robert: THANKS!
Haidt, Jonathan: The Happiness Hypothesis
Hanh, Thich Nhat: No Mud, No Lotus
Harris, Sam: Waking Up
Irvine, William: A Slap in the Face
Ivtzan, Itai, Tim Lomas, Kate Hefferon & Piers Worth: Second Wave Positive Psychology
Kabat-Zinn, Jon: Wherever You Go, There You Are
Reivich, Karen & Andrew Shatte: The Resilience Factor
Wallace, David Foster: This is Water
