SOMETIMES IT'S BETTER THAN YOU PLANNED

Derek Hagen
3 hours ago
4 min read

❝There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.❞ -William Shakespeare, Hamlet

Sometimes the plan breaking is a feature, not a bug.

I'm stuck in traffic on the way to the Austin airport, heading home from a business trip. I picked a late afternoon flight intentionally, just in case some networking opportunities came up. They didn't, so I'm on my way earlier than I'd hoped, already anticipating a few hours of airport time. At least I can get some work done.

As soon as I arrive I get a message: my flight is delayed an hour. Home at 10 instead of 9. Stuck even longer.

Then I set off the metal detector. Multiple times. Belt off. Glasses off. Shoes off. Everything through the scanner. All of it frustrating. I eventually make it through and head toward a restaurant.

On the way I run into some colleagues from the same trip. I've just met these people for the first time, so I hang out for a bit. I know I need to eat before boarding because I'll be in the air during dinner, but the group proposes finding a table somewhere that isn't a restaurant. Nobody's hungry. I decide to go with them anyway.

Delayed flight. TSA kerfuffle. Trade off dinner for conversation.

That's when an old friend of mine from the industry gets off a plane and walks right in front of me.

We catch up over a couple of beers, talking long enough that his name gets called over the intercom. He has to rush to his gate. I realize I have ten minutes before boarding and still haven't eaten.

I find some overpriced pizza and snarfed it down on the way to my gate.

Too much time at the airport. Delayed flight. TSA problems. Crappy pizza for dinner. I still call it a win.

SETBACKS AND OBSTACLES

Not all problems are the same kind of problem.

A setback is something you didn't see coming. A car accident. A job loss. Something that comes out of nowhere and knocks you off pace.

An obstacle is something you knew (or should have known) was coming. Competitive colleagues if you work in a competitive industry. Market downturns if you're an investor. You may not know exactly when or how, but you knew these were part of the terrain.

Zoom out far enough and the collection of all setbacks - every unexpected thing that will happen - is itself something you can plan for. You may not know which bridge will be out. You know some bridge will be out. Shining problems through this prism changes how you respond when they arrive.

VALUE JUDGMENTS ARE PREMATURE

We instinctively label things good or bad. The problem is we're usually labeling in the short run without knowing what it means in the long run.

There's an old story about a farmer whose horse gets away. His neighbors grieve his bad luck. "We'll see," he says. The next day the horse returns with three wild horses. The neighbors celebrate his good luck. "We'll see." His son breaks his arm riding one of the wild horses. The neighbors offer condolences. "We'll see." The next day the military arrives to draft young men. His son can't go because of his injury.

We'll see.

It was easy to see my flight delay and TSA struggles as problems. But those things directly led to running into my friend. Labeling them bad would have been a premature call.

Resilience is the ability to bounce back (or grow) from stress and adversity. The ability to maintain physical, mental, and emotional well-being in the face of setbacks. Learn more about how resilient you are.

THE BRIAN FINDS WHAT IT'S LOOKING FOR

Tell someone it's rare to see an orange car. Later that day, they'll notice several.

A new parent can sleep through construction outside their window but will wake instantly at the faintest sound from their baby. The brain shuts out everything irrelevant and flags what matters.

This is the reticular activating system. The world contains more information than any human can process.

The brain needs a filter, and it builds that filter from what you tell it matters. If you've done the work of knowing your values, your ideal future, what you're actually moving toward, your brain gets primed to notice when the world unexpectedly connects to that vision.

You don't stumble into the better thing. You were prepared to recognize it.

ONGOING PLANNING KEEPS YOU FOCUSED

This is what the ongoing practice of planning delivers. Not a perfect route. A prepared mind and an oriented compass; something to navigate from wherever you are, with whatever just happened, toward what actually matters.

The planning starts again. And sometimes what it finds is better than anything you drew on the map.

Sometimes a flight delay ends with catching up with an old friend.

You get one life; live intentionally.

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